brown-eyed girl

Maybe it wasn’t the time to carry on,

but now the ends have met again.

Like the broken string I made, we mend

and it’s crawling trips and dreams on land.

.

To my brown-eyed girl, with love.

home

On the road of time

along the streets of forgotten grime,

I’d walked alone, never turning behind.

I didn’t realize.

.

I put my feet on the line even while my palms faced behind

Run so far, I’d come to believe the road I’d past was mere history

Couldn’t see the signs that touched my eyes

or the sounds that tried,

or the dreams magnified.

Invisibly visible like a dream in the fog.

.

Reaching roots that planted my feet firmly in the ground whenever I ran,

from the world and myself,

And shadowy branches that provided direction

and foliage that took care.

I kept you in my pocket, sewn into my wounds,

because it kept the emotions from spilling out.

.

go home, little girl.

.

Who knows what this life will bring, stranger things have happened.

this one is for keeps

i hide in my pocket

my hand balled in a fist

secret roses all dethorned

velvety red and strewn all over the place

.

as you slept

I picked up one, and smelt a whole rose bush

then i went around on the ground

picking up the red pieces

knees tucked under my chin just beyond the glass doors

I wanted to give you more

than the little

I hid in my palm.

the IMPORTANCE of being earnest

Written By	Oscar Wilde
Directed By	Glen Goei
Starring	Daniel York as John Worthing Brendon Fernandez as Algernon Moncrief Ivan Heng as Lady Bracknell Hossan Leong as Miss Prism Chua Enlai as Gwendolen Fairfax Gavin Yap as Cecily Cardew Zahim Albakri as Rev. Canon Chasuble Crispian Chan as Lane/Merriman
Musicians	T’ang Quartet: Ang Chek Meng, Leslie Tan, Lionel Tan and Ng Yu Ying

One of the best plays I’ve ever watched. Every member of the cast were as good if not better than expected, with everything from their impeccable accents to their wild gestures making for an excellent performance. The farcical nature of the storyline, further exaggerated, played with the audience – by turns to laugh, to be in respectful silence, even to be stunned.

Every single member of the cast was laugh-out-loud funny. Enlai’s portrayal of Gwendolyn was hilarious with all the feminine wiles, hand-flapping and side-eyed giggles one would have read about the girls of the ton during the Season. Ivan’s cactus-up-the-backside posture was the exact imagery of the overprotective companions in historical romance novels, complete with feathered boas and eyes-that-light-up-with-anything$related. Kudos to every actor, they impressed me with their complete transformation to suit each role.

The T’ang Quartet played familiar tunes before the play begun, and settled the fidgety audience. Their music was presented as much through their instruments as through their bodily and facial expressions. Each individual displayed evident understanding of their place in the quartet and the combination worked out to produce sounds that made me want more. The performance after the interval with the primary focus on cellist Leslie Tan was the best in my opinion, as I felt his talent understated in the earlier pieces.

A play I would recommend to all who have and have not read the original Shakespearean work, to theatre-lovers and theatre-virgins. You’re gonna love it.

Implying40°

The sensational burning kept me warm in my delusion

and I felt like the biggest imp.

When you sponged me down and gave me my pills

i grinned like an elf with gold in his hands.

I curled under my covers, knowing i’d make it worse

and then pitied myself in the unmoving darkness.

You came in once, then went off to bed, promising to be back in some time

but i realised then, that while it was impish in my childhood

It was selfishness at 22.

I stumbled to the basin, and fiddled with the washcloth

and stood in front of the creaky fan

to help myself as i should.

From the thoughts of a still-grinning imp,

i’ll sponge you down when

you burn.

Dedicated to the person i’ve rebelled against, shouted at, cried for and against, walked out on, and forgotten to appreciate for keeping this imp in her body 22 years ago, and now in her heart and mind. The one person who never fails to bring me something on the 14th of February every year, even when I return naught. No amount of material goods can be too much for you. I love you.

don’t magnetize elephants

I saw you, my little white ball of happiness, squirming in my hands, like living, breathing fear.

The evil voice told me to hold you still, against the blue of my tee-shirt, and I did.

You bit me once, then twice, then again and again and again, to tell me you were afraid.

I lost it and yet, I was useless. I only repeated, stop it, stop it, fuck, stop it already!

.

Then He took you, into his cruel hands, where you bit him too.

I’m glad you did.

He held you still against the white of the walls, with a Canon pointed at you, and you were forced to still

I hate him, and yet, I have to send you back.

This time, I will not be dumb, I will not be mute, I will be your voice.

.

In the aftermath of living with your fear embedded in me,

I dreamt.

.

The baby elephant, he sat innocently as they perfected the magnet over his head

With a great suck, the floppy ears at first, they stuck,

then the head, and his face a picture of terrorized horror.

.

They lifted the magnet into the air, and you hurt so bad,

but that was not the worst.

They decided to let the magnet lose its force,

and your head, it sunk first from the magnet,

then your right ear.

.

Then your weight too great to bear, you dropped to the ground, without your right ear.

It was ripped from your head, your face in shocked pain,

and I watched it all happen,

then woke up.

.

Butterscotch, get well, please get well, you’re frightening me so badly. I want you back my little furball, you mean so much to me.

Please get better, my white ball of happiness

I see you there,

you evil girl.

Behind these bars of mine.

.

I wave and cry

still you feed me crumbs.

You evil girl of time.

.

I hear you’re bringing me,

I know it’s gonna hurt.

you know I’m scared,

I lie down like a mat,

yet i’m not heard a line.

.

It’s tomorrow,

you’ve bribed me.

a sunflower seed,

Just one?

.

You, you evil girl,

you’ve promised it’ll be better.

if it isn’t so

after you’ve spent your dime,

I’ll remember you,

this time.

.

Butterscotch is ill.

what have you bought?

On the drive to school, we passed by a sign that said

“Grass for sale”.

me: Di, can just buy a cow and throw him there anot huh, since I buy the grass

*P.S. I thought I was shrewd since my pet would not spare a thought for land divisions and eat more, therefore making my purchase more value-for-money

dad: cannot, you only bought the grass, not the land. you bought the top layer only.

and then he goes on to say…

dad: it’s like our house, we bought a house in the air only.

me: so if the building collapses, we would be trespassing?

dad: yep

How amusing and scary at the same time. What have we actually bought?

Interactive drawings

I wish I’d thought of drawing such stuff.

Credits to humouric.net

daddy

a birthday in 5 days, daddy takes out the faxed-over menu of the buffet spread at Parkroyal. looking through it makes my tummy do flip-flops and then i look up and said, “but i dont want to eat till im full.” and then the brother inserts a comment – “she wants a buffet with no food”

daddy looks at me ridiculously as i bob my head up and down in furious agreement. then, here it comes, daddy says, “come to my buffet la, i set up a store and you eat my buffet. Freshly baked air, chargrilled air, air and air pudding (he knows i love bread & butter pudding).”

as he walked away, i was laughing a little as the depression still stayed. and i thought it was over.

half and hour later, as he went about preparing for bed, yes he fiddles here and diddles there, he suddenly walked past me and said “dragon’s breath (exhales a whole lot of air)”, and this cracked me up inside.

still on the inside, im decomposing. you know its worse when you cry at night and where you were never able to carry on with the tears in the morning, this time you do. and you have no answers for why you feel that way, just that you don’t feel you can ever be happy again. its like someone swallowed your sun.

all i wished to have for my birthday was tung lok soup, crystal jade xiao long bao with ginger & vinegar, fish & beancurd claypot, hokkaido sesame ice cream, chicken skin, salmon belly sushi with vinegar, ji tang mian xian, half a chicken from cold storage, bring hashbrown out for a walk. i wish i remembered how to smile, to laugh. please help me.